"You slapped me in the tip of the dick!"
Random guy sitting outside the bar: “Fuck yeah motherfucker!”
A friend of mine got onto my facebook account after I left it open last night. Then he made me “attend” three family reunions with people I’ve never met, and posted comments on every single one. Some of the things “I” said were:
“I miss you all, especially Uncle Jeff”
"Best time I ever had"
"See you guys next year!"
And my favorite:
”They say kissing your cousin is ok if they’re second or third on the bloodline, right? Oh well ;)”